Ch-ch-ch-changes!

My friend, Aleia, was rummaging through her old picture files on her computer and she came across some photos of me when I was heavier (not at my heaviest, though!), before I lost 180 pounds. I don't recognize myself in them. I mean, I do and I don't.

It's so weird seeing what I looked like back then. I feel like I'm a different person now. But, not so different. I still feel for that guy staring back at me in the photos. I want to reach out to him and tell him... What do I want to tell him? That it will get better. That there is a whole world of possibility out there that he hasn't even dreamed of.

Pictures like these inspire me to keep moving forward. Change is always a possibility. It's inevitable, in fact.

Here are the pictures:





Here is another "Before and After" that I have posted before.



Click here to read Part 1 of my post about my weight loss journey. Click here for Part 2.

Fat, Cashew Butter, and Other Such Random Musings...

Fat does not necessarily make you fat. We all know that. And, we all need some healthy fat in our diets. It isn't bad for you, per se. But, it is easy to overeat it. Compared to the other macronutrients, fat should comprise a relatively small percent of your diet. As an ultrarunner, I like to stick to the 60/20/20 ratio. That is: 60% of my daily calorie intake comes from carbs, 20% from protein, and 20% from fat. I like this ratio. It works for me. So how do I get my fat?



Well, lately, I notice I've been relying heavily on cashew butter. I love the stuff. I eat it with just about anything. The thing about cashew butter is, it can be sweet or it can be salty. I used to smear some on some on whole wheat bread and squirt some honey on top, but since I turned vegan, no more honey for me. Insert sad face! Seriously though, you should try this magical, rich, creamy food.

Speaking of fat, have you ever heard of the website This is Why You're Fat? It is a site that features really fatty, really unhealthy food concoctions that people have made or eaten. Most of the food looks really gross. Some items look, I'm ashamed to admit, intriguing. Here are some of my favorite gross-outs:

Chocolate-covered bacon on a stick...



Spam fries...



And the best: deep-fried lard balls with powdered sugar sprinkled on top...



Now, take some time to recover. These are obviously NOT the kinds of fats you want in your diet. Try some cashew butter instead!

Feeling run down

What do you do when you just can't seem to get into the groove of things? Ever since Badwater, I have been feeling down. My runs haven't been as good as they used to be. I feel slow and out-of-shape. I feel fat, like I'm gaining weight. I feel like I haven't progressed at all as a runner this summer. I just feel down. Part of it may have to do with the fact that my dad is still in the hospital. Maybe I'm depressed over that. Maybe I'm also depressed over going back to law school. I really don't want to go back to Lubbock. I dread it so much and would give anything not to have to endure the ordeal. But, that's just not possible. I have to go back and finish my last year of school. Meanwhile, I seem to be in a running rut and I don't know how to work my way out of it.

This is turning into a rant, so, to avoid that, I want to leave some constructive advice... wisdom for the Gerry of the Future who may decide to read back on this entry: stay strong and realize that things will get better. This too shall pass. What seems like an insurmountable obstacle now, will someday seem trifling and silly. Just, keep moving forward and be grateful for what you have. Count your blessings. Keep running.